short story collection
by teko kasanen
Summary: a short story collection by yours truly
1. Chapter 1

Teko:hello long time no ill cut right to the chase this is a one shot sing fic my first one so if its not written good im sorry also who ever guess this song will get…well… the best I can give that is appropriate is a dedication on one of my if you want something in appropriate you can do anything sexual to private or skipper.

Private and skipper:WHAT.

Teko:uh I mean lets start the music.

*Song starts*

[Kowalski]Set fire to the lab.

[private]Get stabbed by a lunacorn horn.

[Skipper] Crack you skull falling while taking a nap.

[Rico]Choking on a piece of corn,

[the penguins]

Dumb ways to die.

So many dumb ways to die.

Dumb ways to die.

So many dumb ways to die.

[Dr blowhole]Have you blowhole covered up.

[Clemson]Get shocked while laughing evilly.

[Savio]Get eaten when you the predator.

[Hans]Falls to death thinking you can fly.

[the four villains and the penguins]

Dumb ways to die.

So many dumb ways to die.

Dumb ways to die.

So many dumb ways to die.

[julien]Get crushed by a falling throne.

[Mort]Get mistaken for a mango.

[Marlene]Use the slide and land on spikes.

[joey]Get killed by animal control.

[Every body]

Dumb ways to die.

So many dumb ways to die.

Dumb ways to die.

So many dumb ways to die.

[Bada]Slip on a banana peel.

[Bing]Kill yourself over losing food.

[Darla]Square dance off the edge.

[Maurice]Hey what is that light.*gets run over by a train*

[Everybody]

Dumb ways to die.

So many dumb ways to die.

Dumb ways to die.

So many dumb ways to die.

[Fred]Not getting out of the hawks digestive track.

[Mama Duck]Being eaten by the snake head fish.

[Uncle Nigel]Disappointed from discovering private was not acting.

[Buck rockgut] starved trying to find the red squirrel.

[Red squirrel] killed by a invention gone wrong.

[Skipper]

We know this song didn't rhyme but these really are the.

[everybody]

Dumbest ways to die.

dumbest ways to die.

dumbest ways to die.

so many dumb.

so many dumb ways to die.

teko:this was brought to you by a fan fiction writer please don't let animals die a stupid death.

skipper:oh my god you mean to tell me this had a point.

teko:…yes.

skipper:wow that's a first.

teko:oh shut for those that are wondering about any story's that I did not update in a while they will be update its just I have other stuff to do that are flooding this for me ok that's it see ya.


	2. Chapter 2

Teko :...any body wants to here a joke

Kowalski:sure

Teko:what is small,squishy,and unwanted

Rico:(grunted)...a wet soft ball

Teko:no

Skipper:...a gallbladder

teko:no

kowalski:fecal mater

teko:ew no

kowalski:then what

teko:a fetus

Private Kowalski and Skipper:*eyes widened and jaw hanging*

rico:hahahahaha

*for this to make sense the words between the parentheses are that the penguins are saying while i'm talking)

teko:...ok i guess its a little dark(skipper: wow) but you guys know how i am i don't think(skipper:wow)about it so please let me go on this one(skipper:WOW).OK ALRIGHT I'M SORRY

kowalski:...you sicken me

teko:you went to bed with private last night

skipper:WHAT

kowalski:that's not true

teko:ok i admit it wasn't you...it was skipper

kowalski:well of course that's true

skipper:is it really that obviuse

rico:yep

private:how did you three know

teko:don't you know when people have sex a demon is present to watch

skipper:so you saying its a sin

teko:no they just like to watch

skipper:so how dose that explain how you know

teko:my brother keto id a demon and saw you two doing it

skipper:dame you keto

keto:go suck a dick...oh wait you already

skipper: mumbels go fuck you self

private:aren't i gonna get any dialog in this

teko:you already did

private:...darn

kowalski:uh teko

teko:yes

skipper:the story

teko:oh yeah here it is

song:i'll just quit singing (private edition)

by:vocaloids

[private]

i am done

i am through

i can't take it any more

you all just make fun of me as if i was your punching bag

i am done

i am through

i cant take it any more

i am not a giant sissy

i'm caring

knock it of

(piano)

ever since i came to the zoo

every one make fun of what i like

except for Marlene

and when ever i say

something that is logical

you pass it on a crazy talk

when your one who is

even tough i like the Luna corns

you all have your one fault

that out weight my own

and you if you don't i'll say them all

like skipper has paranoia

Rico's crazy

and kowalski is obsessed with a dolphin

(suddenly music turrns off and the zoo animals appear out of nowhere confused)

and bada and bing are lone sharks .julien is spoiled mort is retarded .the poison dart frog is flamingo is elephants also a chameleons cant rhino destroys everything in his path and the polar bear...i have no problems with the polar bear and Maurice and Marlene. (zoo animals arguing but then disappreared and the music resumes)

i am done

i am trough

i can't take it any more

now that i told your faults hopefully you'll stop bothering me.

i am done

i am though

i cant take it any more

the Luna corns teach good things so they are not all that bad.

i am done

i am through

i can't take it any more

if you know a lot more then tell me why your so mean

i am done

i am through

i can't take it anymore

SCREW YOU AALLLL

skipper:is that true

private:well kinda

teko:hey guys this is really great and all but can i do something really quick

skipper:what

teko:ok so i want to give a shout out to a cool writer called sweet pripper for giving me thumbs up for this chapter

skipper:thats it?

teko:no also at first this story was gonna be one chapter of a song fic but know i decided it will be a collection of one shot both song fic and regular fics witch will be rated both t and m

skipper:good for you now can i have my conversation with private

teko:sure but not here because this is the end of the chapter.

skipper:well fu


	3. Chapter 3

skipper:humans are dumb

teko:what why

because you people don''t know have the computer a whole world of information to replenish the mind and you all use it for porn,games and cat video

teko:we know quality we help our own we help animals and to show that we are know stupid i will make this chapter a crock of crap that they will complain and know its a crock of crap

skipper:fine go ahead they will say some stuff about hidden meaning and how its actually a piece of art when its really a crock of nonsence

teko:ok here it is the crock of crap

chapter 3 crap

skipper is in his bunk with a tablet he stole from the lost and found and is going through the web history of it and found a site called good long was curius about this because what did it mean by went in and his eyes practilly popped out of his saw private,kowalski,rico,julien,hans,clemson, and some how savio in this site also the site was organise in this way there are pictures of the guys and then you click on the picture to see the content they were saw a see all botten then pressed it and saw all of the videos the group was in they did things like XXXXXX and XXXXX and xxxx and was suprised at all of this then he looked down and saw he had a XXXXX."wait i bird don't have XXXX".the XXXX then came to life and said in this world they when the XXXX stoped talking the the four came down and saw a dissapointed showed them the tablet showing the site and the three blushed and looked down in asked why and the three answerd "because it was fun".

every one mentioned in this:*looked at the story suprised and looked at teko*

clemson:wow this really was a load of crap

hans:ya its short badly written and dosen't even has a proper end

teko:yeah and the readers will agree its a load a crap proving that the human race dose knows quality and is not dumb

skipper:i still don't balive humans are intellegent

teko:just you wait baad reviews will pour in here like a tidal wave now please people give me a bad review to prove we are not stupid see ya in the next chapter.


End file.
